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Writer's pictureKwahera Spears

Communication: The topic we all love to hate.


Communication, there is so much I can say about this word so let’s get started. There are four main types of communication verbal, non-verbal (body language), written (text, social media, etc.), visual (art, personal style). On a daily basis we communicate both by giving and receiving all of the previously stated forms of communications. For example, we share thoughts through social media platforms for things we like, support, and don’t support. This tells our followers/friends/family what we believe and even gives a glimpse inside our passions. We wear clothing that support our visional style i.e., modern or conservative. While I love all forms of communication, today we are going to focus on verbal communication.

Verbal communication is when we use our voice to communication or send a message. When using our voices there are different things to consider. Has someone ever said to you, “it wasn’t what you said but how you said it?” Our tone varies depending on our mood or even the person we are communicating. For example, a parent may communicate anger with their 3-year-old in a different tone than they would with their 16-year-old. It is important to consider our tone when attempting to convey a message we actually want the receiver to get.

Another aspect of verbal communication is the use of absolutes. What are absolutes, you ask? Well, they are the “always” and “never’s” we accuse others of when communicating. For example, “You never help me around the house.” Or “You are always nagging me.” Absolutes are rarely, if ever, true. These are the words we use when emotional during disagreements. These words tend to escalate tension or shut down communication all together. No one wants to be accused of never or always doing something wrong.

Communication is so important in our daily lives and learning to communicate is difficult. However, when putting some thought and effort into our communication we can help improve our relationships. Proverbs 15:1 state, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” So, let all work to better communicate today.


Kwahera Spears is a Licensed Clinical Social, Certified Life Coach and Owner/Operator of Crescent City Solutions

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